True Friendship

Friends. I would say have many friends. Sure, I have plenty of people that I could hang out with. Plenty of people that I could laugh on and on with.

But heres the problem...
How many of those people are actually my true friends? Sadly, Not Many.

Lately my eyes have been opened to the emptiness of friendships.

I want friends that will be there when I need them.

Friends who I can text and tell them I need prayers and I know they are one their knees before the throne of God.

Friends to be truly happy when I'm happy. [I am so bad at this. Too often do I shatter others joy because I am so selfish and I want that happiness for myself.]

Friends who, when I'm walking through a dark path, dont just watch me but rather step into the darkness with me and lead me to the light.

Friends who I can pray with. Not just saying "I'll pray for you" (side note: How often do we say that and never actually do it?) Hearing others pray is one of the most encouraging things.

Friends where it isn't awkward to talk about God. Where Abba God is at the base of our conversations.

Friends who dont talk about eachother behind their backs. (I see this too much.)

Friends where I dont have to worry about the bad jokes or decisions they are going to make.

Friends who are constantly speaking truth over me.


Im so thankful that God has placed a couple people like this in my life and it is such a blessing! I say these things not only for what I crave my friendships to look like but also to preach at myself. I like to say that I try my very best to be this type of friend. But I fail at doing so. Often times I let myself get busy and worry about me me me instead of my friends. I want my friendships to be Full instead of empty. Overflowing with God's grace and goodness.

"This is my commandment: Love each other in the same way I have loved you. There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends." -John 15:12-13
I have read this verse probably more times then I can count. I dont think Love each other in the same way I have loved you. part has ever clicked. Jesus calls,no commands us to love the way He has loved us! His love for us is so vast. His love for us is unconditional and never-ending. That means that I should love others even when they do wrong to me. Forgive what seems to be unforgivable. Enveloping others in love in times of heartache. Putting others above myself.

I pray that I can be a true friend and really love just as Christ has loved me.

I am a Woman of God

Last night I saw courageous. Great great movie. It was about what God wanted for his sons. This sparked the interest in my mind of what does God want for his Daughters? What was his intent for us? What does being a woman of God look like?
I'm starting a journey to figure out what The King of Kings really wants for and from his daughters. I'm excited to see what God will reveal to me! I found this last night and it is just beautiful.

I am a Woman of God.

I am capable, intelligent and virtuous woman.
I am far more precious than jewels and my value is far above rubies and pearls.
Strength and Dignity are my clothing and my position is strong and secure.
I open my mouth with skillful and godly wisdom.
The bread of idleness, gossip, discontent and self-pity I will not eat.

The beauty of the world is vain but my beauty comes from reverently fearing the Lord.
Each day I will focus on the present knowing that God's grace is sufficient for every task.

I surrender all disappoints, fears and misunderstandings to the Lord.
Forgetting those things that are behind and laying every sin and weight that easily entangles me, I press on to the high prize of being a Woman of God.

I am strong in you, Lord and in the power of your might.
God, you are my Father and I am your precious daughter.
Jesus, you are my bridegroom and I am your beautiful bride.
I am created in your image, a picture of your love.






Beautiful Girls, Dwell on these things.

Isaiah 55:8

"My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord.
'And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.'"
-Isaiah 55:8

My plans are far different from God's. Upon the arrival to San Quintin we were notified of a tragic accident. One of the tween boys (Issac), who was deaf and mute, was hit by a car and passed away on the way to the hospital. My mindset was changed. My plans for the next day were changed. My prayer was changed. Going to church sunday I entered into a place of mourning and sorrow but yet there was peace. You could tell the people of the church were rooted in God and were trusting in HIM. The church became a place to cry, a place to heal and a place to be loved. It was incredibly beautiful how all of it took place. Preachers from all the churches in Baja came to show support for Issacs family and for the chruch family of San Quintin. I wish thats how it is here in America.

Sunday afternoon I was called to something bigger than myself. Mr.Lee asked me to go with him to help get ready for the funeral/wake for Issac. Why me? Its something I have never done. I truly believe that was how God wanted me to send peace and comfort to this family. We wanted it to be beautiful for Issac. He was an exceptional kid. We went and got pure white flowers and royal blue fabric for them to be placed on. At the end of the day I was exhausted and in great need of God's strength.

Over the course of sunday evening and Monday I heard God whisper "Follow me." I prayed that God would open my eyes to the things unseen. The very next day I had the oppurtunity of going with Jason Bybee on Benevolence. It was a smaller group which I love because it is more intimate. The first house we went to the spirit of God was ever so present. A lady was in bad need of crutches and medical attention to her foot. Luckily a girl that was with us had medical experience. We had a new mission for the day, to find crutches for this precious lady. We found some but they were too tall so some of our wonderful Dads worked magic and made them the perfect height. It gets better. As the day goes on we met a lady named Francessca. She has been having problems with her ex-husband. He is trying to get her to move out of her house and has gotten a lawyer involved. All because he wants the money. We shared tears with her and prayed over her. Join me in praying that God with intervene in this situation. In the afternoon everyone was going to the soccer game but I felt called to visit more homes and spend time with these people. They have so much to teach me. So Jason and 3 others plus a translator set off to the home of Maria. She is a single mother with the cutest little boy named Aaron. The more we talked with her we learned that she has been struggling with the decision to be baptized. She is scared that she will mess up and she doesnt want to end up like her dad who has an alcohol addicition. Jason talked with her for over and hour and i really believe she was encouraged and one step closer to making the best decision of her life. Overall, this was my favorite day because Gods presence was everywhere.

I crave for the simplicity of life that abounds in Baja. Though they dont have much material things they have something that is priceless. They have a faith that isnt shaped by the world's view. They truly know what it means to be a church family. In the midst of their brokeness they come as they are and handle their struggles together. That is something that I miss the most along with the precious children. I long to hold one of the precious kids in my arms, they are so loving.Their sweet smiles fill me with joy. By striving to bend lower and lower (previous post) this year I got the most out of it. I pray that if its God will he will lead me back there.

True Reflection

If you are anything like me when you hear someone say "Be Jesus", "Be the image of God" I think loving the unlovable and being nice to everyone. Those things are true but it is so much deeper than that.

The other day in class I was thanking one of my teachers for being respectful of her students and she said, "of course! Do some teachers not respect you?" I said, "No, therefore if they cant respect me I will not respect them." She responded with, "Jesus stills respects those people." Whoa. So true. I was thrown back by her comment and it was very eye opening.

Personally, when someone hurts me or throws my heart on the side of the road I get mad and I dont want to talk them ever again because of the pain they have caused me. If someone hurts me and they dont realize it I start waiting for an apology and hold anger against them till they have realized it. How many times could God do that to us? Every day God could forget us and say you have hurt me so many times that im done with you. I will not love you anymore. Go on your way. Or he could easily say you still havent apologized for that one night or that one sin so im done pursuing you and hold anger towards us. Here is the thing, He doesnt do that.

God keeps pursuing me when I dont reflect him in the best ways. He still loves me. He still wants the best for me. When I havent asked for forgivness yet, he makes me white as snow. He never leaves when I dont do my best for him. Praise God for that.


Abba God,
Transform me to be more like you and I mean really like you. Take every part of my life and my thoughts and consume them. Overcome my flesh and fill me up with you. I want to be a true reflection of you.

"Let yourselves be pulled into a way of life shaped by God's life, a life energetic and blazing with holiness. God said, "I am Holy; you be Holy." -1 Peter 1:15-16 (MSG)

My Inheritance

Yesterday, I had the oppurutnity to do something that was far bigger than myself. I spoke in Girls chapel. This is something I have always planned on doing but not until my senior year. God had some other plans. Abba placed in me this passion and told me I needed to tell more girls about it.
I had a few weeks to prepare and let me tell you though it wasnt easy. Satan was completley against me because he knew I was doing something to advance the Kingdom of God. Satan constantly whispered lies to me Nobody wants to hear what you have to say. You arent really passionate about this. Its too much trouble to let this happen. Give up now. Do you really believe in that big and powerful God? I wasnt going to let Satan win, I fought against the lies and prayed fervently for God to speak truth over me.
The day finally came and God filled me up with HIS spirit and I'm completley convinced it was Him who was talking through me. I asked everyone to bring their bibles so they could follow along with me. We camped out in Genesis 25:29-34:
"Once when Jacob was cooking some stew, Esau came in from the open country, famished. 30 He said to Jacob, “Quick, let me have some of that red stew! I’m famished!”
Esau is starving. He has a big appetite. Just as in our lives we all hunger and crave for something. Maybe its acceptance, Maybe all you want is to be loved, Maybe all you desire is winning, Maybe you just want to be recongnized. We look to the world for all of this things when God already gives them to us. We can stop seeking. HE accepts you just the way you are. HE Loves you with an everlasting love and there is nothing you can do that could make him love you any less. God wins. HE has already won the ultimate battle for us. God reconizes you. For the things you do for his kingdom. He calls you by name. Appetites are never going to go away. They are never fully satisfied. Its like going to your favorite restaurant and eating your favorite meal and you are so stuffed that you say you are never eating again. Then 3 hours later you are looking in the pantry.

"31Jacob replied, “First sell me your birthright.” 32 “Look, I am about to die,” Esau said. “What good is the birthright to me?” 33 But Jacob said, “Swear to me first.” So he swore an oath to him, selling his birthright to Jacob. 34 Then Jacob gave Esau some bread and some lentil stew. He ate and drank, and then got up and left.So Esau despised his birthright."

Having the birthright is a big deal. There are 3 things taht come along with having the birthright. If you had the birthright you got a double portion of the inheritance. You also got to be the judge of the family after the parents were gone and also with it came a sense of blessing. As I was reading this I thought who does that? who sales their birthright for a bowl of stew? You do. Everyday we trade our inheritance from God for something that we think is more important. Such as gossip, we are too worried about knowing the latest news or spending more time with your boyfriend than you do God or having sex with your boyfriend or cheating, because you want to do good on that really hard test or lying or wanting to be envied even for our faith. I think one that I struggle with is spending more time on facebook than with God. Satan does a great job of making these things look good and makes us think they will fill us but it is just a cheap imidation of the real treasure.

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. According to His great mercy, He has given us a new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that is imperishable, uncorrupted, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who are being protected by God's power through faith for a salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time." -1 Peter 1:3-5 HCSB

Dont trade your inheritance ftom God for a temporary bowl of stew because you have no idea how God may use you to change the world. Think of the day when finally reach home and you are in the presence of God in all its glory and you see Jesus face to face. You run and embrace him and he embraces you. He looks you in the eyes and says "Well done my good and faithful servant." What a beautiful reunion it will be. So I ask you what is in your bowl of stew? Whats keeping you from God?
I played the song My inheritance by Ronnie Freeman
The response was overwhelming. So many people came to give me hug and feed me words of praise and encouragement. Today I recieved an envelope full of cards from some of the middle school girls.

God assured me that his voice was heard. Its not because of anything I have done, but because of who God is. This is the power of Christ in me. I am merely a hole in the flute that God breathes through. I have only stood along the shore of God's beauty and goodness.

I'm not trading anything for the inheritance of God because he is my very great reward and nothing compares to knowing and loving Him.

Happiness Inspires Hope

Wow. Where to start with my week at Give Kids the World. God put together the perfect team. Our job was to be joyful and I learned that through being happy it gave them hope. It was the most draining trip emotionally and physically. At first I thought the trip was going to be emotionally draining because of hearing the stories and of what I saw but it wasnt that at all. I feel like I gave all of myself, everything was about the families and the kids. Completley had to take yourself out of the picture. I realized that is what Jesus did for us, He gave His all so we could have joy and have a hope of spending eternity with Him.

The first morning I was nervous and I didnt know what to expect. My job was working in the gingerbread house which is the place where the families eat. I had the job of carrying their trays to the table. Let me tell you they didnt expect it and their faces lit up when you served them. I had the best job, I was able to talk with the families and just get to know them. Many of the kids didnt look sick in fact it was hard to even tell who the sick child was in the family, but then there were many who looked very sick and it was hard but I tried my best to look at them through God's eyes. While serving donuts later on in the morning a mom asked Mckenna and I come over to her table and all she wanted was to tell us the story of her son. Her son was diagnosed with lymphoma disease. The doctors told them that he had two weeks to live and they had the choice of letting him go or try to do an aggressive treatment and had the possibility of dying in the process. They choose the aggressive treatment and it worked, he was healed. It has been a year and a half and he is doing great.

I have many stories and memories I can tell. I could talk for hours on how magical this place is. In one of my previous posts I talked about how we werent allowed to talk about God publicly. I am certain that God's voice was heard this week and it was loud. In the chapel there are journals where families, volunteers and staff could pray and write. I went through both of the journals and read every entry. It was hard to read them but at the same time it was very uplifting. Many parents expressed that they had lost all faith in God when their child became sick but they said that being able to go to Give Kids the World seeing their child happy and being able to relax restored their faith. Give Kids the World Village is God's place. One prayer that touched me was written by a 10 year old girl named Olivia and she wrote how thankful she was for God healing her. She said "thanks to you Jesus Im fine now, im more than fine, Im great. I cant wait to spend eternity with you."

One of my favorite moments was the last night when I was working the big splash bash I meet a 10 year old boy named Brody from Austrailia. Im not sure what his illness was but that didnt matter. All he wanted to do was dance. He grabbed my hands and we started dancing. He even taught me some new dance moves. He had the biggest smile that melted my heart.

Writing this was hard but also easy at the same time. It was hard because I long to be with those kids and the families. It was easy because it was the best week and I feel in love with that place. If its God's will, I hope to return many times there.

"Stand up and praise the LORD your God, who is from everlasting to everlasting. "Blessed be your glorious name, and may it be exalted above all blessing and praise. You alone are the LORD. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship you." -Nehemiah 9:5b-6

1 Day

Wednesday morning I make my way down to Flordia, right outside of Orlando for a mission trip to Give Kids The World. It is part of the Make a Wish Foundation and is a huge resort for Kids who have a life-threatening illness.I cannot wait to be down there. I know going into this trip that it is going to be emotionally draining but that isnt my biggest worry or obstacle that I will be facing. While we are down there we arent allowed to speak about God unless someone brings it up first. When they first told us that, it was something really hard to understand. I am so used to going to Mexico or wherever and the whole point of the trip is to spread the name of God. Trying to process this through my mind I knew I had to go straight to God with this. God filled my mind with the perfect thoughts and mind set of going into this.
Abba Father,
I pray for the trip down to Give Kids the World, despite the fact that we cant speak of you, your name is still able to be heard! May we love those kids with your love Father. Open my eyes to the things unseen. Even though some of the people may not know you and thats hard for us to process, God let me know that you know what you are doing and the best thing we can do is pray because prayer changes things. Make me strong God, let your joy flow out of me, in hopes of letting people see you. Just because we cant speak of you, that doesnt make you unpresent. You are always with me. I pray that I seek out your strength and your love. You have put each of us on this team for a reason and im so excited about what you are going to do. Prepare our hearts Oh Lord...Let me go unafraid...

"You are a letter from Chirst..written not with ink but with the spirit of the living God, not on tablets of stone but on tablets of human hearts." -2 Corinthians 3:3