The season of life that I am in is one that is very dry and trying.
Many burdens have been piling on top of me keeping my face to the ground hiding me from my glorious Savior.
The burden of Junior Senior and not having a date. (not really a big deal but satan made it into one)
The burden and fear of the Unknown.
The burden of not having a church home that fills my soul.
The burden of feeling like a failure.
The burden of being good enough for my parents.
These things of been pressing in on me...becoming too much for my ever so fragile heart to bear.
I have let these things cripple me.
I have been desperate for healing.
This I know:
I am beautiful because my Lord is truly beautiful.
Guys do NOT define me. My identity is found in Christ alone.
One day my soul will have an eternal home where I can drink freely from the stream of life.
I am NOT a failure in the eyes of my Father. Even though the world keeps telling me that I am.
If Abba God says that I am successful and an over comer then I am.
..Despite what the world says.
To Jesus, I'm good enough.
HE loves me for who I am.
HE loves me in all of my imperfections and mess ups.
HE knows me better than I know myself.
HE understands me in all of my complexity.
The Living One sees me.
I just got back from Ecuador and the healing spirit was ever so present.
On the plane, God let me see one of his best paintings.
Yes, a sunset :)
To make things better, in the book I was reading it was as if He was speaking directly to me.
Here are a few things that spoke to me:
(From the book, The Resolution for Women)
'The life you're renovating has far too much God- given potential for you to plant its roots in something so menial. Dig deep and lean in to the truth-the truth of who you are and what He's created you to offer the world.'
'We were each created by God to do our part. And if we fail to do it because we dont think its valuable enough, great loss will be suffered. Someone, somewhere, needs you- in all of your uniqueness- to step up to the plate of your calling...Rather than seeking to impress and out perfrom others and rather than feeling ashamed by what you don't have and can't do, relish the opportunity to stand as a living, walking, eating, breathing example of what God's grace can do with a women He has set apart, weakness and all, to be a sacred vessel in His service. You are a purposeful place setting. A masterpiece worth celebrating.'
'Even if you may not be inherently pleased with the person He's made you to be, even if you maybe not abundantly happy with the circumstances you're currently living, you can be sure that God has planted you here with design and intention. He has selected the "soil" where you're presently growing... It's all been divinely designed yo surround you with the conditions that allow your unique gifts and abilities to reach maximum potential. To grow. To yield. To produce.'
My spirit is on the mend.
Slowly, my spirit is being renewed.
I'm coming out of the desert.
I'm ready to rise up out of this valley.
What I keep telling myself:
Keep walking through this desolate and dry place. Gushing rivers and streams are ahead where you can drink deep and rest.
You are strong and you are okay.
Head up, the best is yet to come.
Trust Him. He Knows you. He has special plans for you.
